Another Day on the Virtual Fat Farm

Starting Weight: 324.5 lbs
Weight Last Sunday: 284.5 lbs
Weight today: 281.5 lbs
Weight Lost This Week: 3 lbs
Weight Lost to Date: 43 lbs
Weeks Completed: 12
Weeks to go: 40

OK...another week of trying to undo ten years of unbridled gorging. I'm back on the program this week folks. 3 lbs of McDonald's/Taco Bell/sampler appetizers from RAM have been exorcised from "the temple". How is that for a fat-laden anecdote wrapped in a religious reference? Mea culpa. OK, I'll stop.

I would be lying if I said it was still really easy to keep doing this. Don't get me wrong, eating right and exercising is still pretty easy. What is tough is imbibing (or the lack thereof). Since spring is in the air there are all sorts of things happening. Trees are blooming, grass is getting green, birds are singing, and Len is getting almost nightly invites to:

Go to [insert bar] and sit outside and drink [insert drink of choice].

I really enjoy getting together with friends over a pint or six. The problem is drinking beer only helps you loose weight if you don't eat. In that instance cirrhosis is is good for weight loss but really bad for liver health and um living. The week of St. Patrick's day I was able to enjoy some nights out but it cut into my weight loss. Now that I think about it, I'm sounding an awful lot like an alcoholic. Stay tuned for my newest blogging endeavor called "Diary of Angry Lush".

The irritating yet quasi cool thing going on now is that I am in a transition weight. This means my clothes don't really fit but I'm not ready to drop a size in my clothes yet. Maybe I could just buy a Snuggie and wear it around for the next nine months. I could tell everyone it's a Tibetan monk thing. I could also easily reach for the remote while comfortably relaxing on the sofa (don't believe me...watch the infomercial).

I'm going to forgo the "Today's Nasty Fat Side Effect". I wish I could say the pain of self-deprecating humor has wounded me too deeply. The reality is that I haven't a thing humorous to report. Sufficed to say, being a disgusting fat body is a nasty fat side effect of being fat. 'Nuff said.

Until next week, peace and weightlessness...er weight loss...to all.

Len

http://trappedinafatman.blogspot.com/

I've Lost the Equivalent of a Bag of Rock Salt

Starting Weight: 324.5 lbs
Weight Last Saturday: 286 lbs
Weight today: 284.4 lbs
Weight Lost This Week: 1.5 lbs
Weight Lost to Date: 40 lbs
Weeks Completed: 11
Weeks to go: 41

It's not a terribly impressive report today but it is a significant milestone. Though I only lost a pound and a half, I have finally hit the 40 pound mark. To put that in perspective, a bag of Morton's rock salt weights 40 lbs as does a bag of top soil, Keira Knightley, and eight 5lb bags of flour.

My moderate loss this week can be attributed to one word: drinking. I had a few beers on St. Patrick's day, and went out Saturday night (a.k.a. last night). If you remember, I also started the week off 5.5 lbs bloated from a drink fest a week ago last Saturday. I did have fun this week and while I know that I have to cut the drinking back if I want to progress, I think it was a good time in the diet to cut lose. Now I want to push on to getting the rest of this weight off. According to my project goals, I have 60 lbs to go by Jan 14, 2010. In total, I have about 85 lbs more to lose.

Time for another edition of Today's Nasty Fat Side-Effect. This one may be a little more of the PG-13 rated variety but it's certainly relevant. Today we are going to talk about man breasts. These unfortunate visitors happen when men get heavy. You don't have to be a manatee-looking slob to have man boobies. Moderately overweight men can get them too. Regardless of your girth, they are embarrassing. There's nothing more sad than ripping off your shirt at the beach and having some woman retract in horror until she realizes you are not an older hairy woman flashing people. Seinfeld has a hilarious episode on bras for men. Suggested titles for said appliance include the "Bro" and the "Manssier". I really can't think of the equivalent side-effect for a woman. It's not like one day a woman will get fat enough to develop a large Adam's Apple. Maybe hair on a woman's upper lip might come close. The bottom line is that this side-effect adds insult to injury. Not only are you overweight, but you are developing female characteristics. Believe it or not, there is a scientific name for this: gynecomastia. And a word to the wise gents, I hear this condition is very hard to reverse as breast weight is the last to go. In any event, I look forward to one day replacing my man-ta ta's with pecks!

Well that does it for this week's post. I want to thank my readers for their words of encouragement. See you next week.

Peace and love,

Len

http://trappedinafatman.blogspot.com

Changing it up a bit

Starting Weight: 324.5 lbs
Weight Last Sunday: 289 lbs
Weight yesterday: 286 lbs
Weight Lost This Week: 3 lbs
Weight Lost to Date: 38.5 lbs
Weeks Completed: 10
Weeks to go: 42

OK...I'm changing things up a bit. This week I am taking my Saturday weight instead of my Sunday weight. The reason for this is that I gave myself the night off last night and ate/drank a little much. I'm sure the 5 1/2 lbs the scales said I gained since I weighed at 2:00p yesterday afternoon are mostly water weight. ;-)

Back on the wagon today though.

I would like to thank my wife and my mother and father-in-law for a very good time last night. It feels good to cut loose. That said, it makes me want to knuckle down and try even harder today since I don't feel as well this morning as I'm used to feeling.

Here is the testimony from last night:

- About 1/2 pound of this way cool Mexican dip my mother-in-law made (ground beef, corn, chilis, mexican seasoning)
- About 30 Baked Lays scoop chips to shovel the aforementioned tastiness into my mouth
- 10 Tag Along Girl Scout cookies
- 1 piece of cheese cake
- 8 shots of Crown Royal
- 2 DIET A & W cream sodas (a boy has to watch his figure you know)

We also toasted to many of our dead relatives. How Irish of us?

Anywho, my goal for this week is to break the 40lbs lost barrier. Wish me luck!

Peace and love,

Len

http://trappedinafatman.blogspot.com/

I Lost How Much Weight This Week?

Starting Weight: 324.5 lbs
Weight Last Sunday: 294 lbs
Weight Today: 289 lbs
Weight Lost This Week: 5 lbs
Weight Lost to Date: 35.5 lbs
Weeks Completed: 9
Weeks to go: 43

OK, I'm a little befuddled. I had a 5 lb drop this week. I didn't starve myself and I didn't walk any more than usual (2 miles/day). Don't get me wrong, I'm happy. I'll shed this gelatinous nastiness anyway I can. I just wasn't prepared for this big a loss. That's really a lie. I weigh myself twice a day. I knew exactly what I as going to weigh today. That said, considering the extreme stress between work and mom's health, I really don't know how this happened.

This week I rediscovered Morning Star Farms veggie burgers and veggie chicken patties. They are very tasty. I'm not trying to be a vegetarian...but the veggie stuff is just a little healthier than a hamburger or a real breaded chicken patty. Morning Star also makes veggie buffalo wings. They are like chicken nuggets (no meat obviously) with buffalo spices. They are delish! They provide me with more variety and QUICK ways to eat.

Time for another episode of Today's Nasty Fat Side Effect". Today, we are going to discuss extreme belly button depth, scientifically referred to as Cavernous Umbilicus. Most folks have a belly button for which they can see the bottom just by looking in a mirror. When you get laaaaarge, the depth of said belly button increases. When you are major pork product, you end up with this wishing well type thing on your stomach. Besides the obvious negativity of having what amounts to a hole in the middle of your stomach, there are the issues with making sure it stays clean and free of belly button lint. This can be an issue when you have a normal belly button. When you have a fat-induced crater, it can be challenging. I remember losing one of my kids in my belly button for a week. It all worked out well because when she finally climbed out, she had my TV's remote control, a jelly bean, and many coins that were evidently tossed in by hopefuls whist offering up wishes. I exaggerate. I don't eat jelly beans.

Anyway, this was a good week. They all are really. Clothes are getting more loose and I'm feeling better than I have in years. I can't imagine what it will be like to be down below 250 some day (dare I say it, 200?). It's been a really long time.

Until next week, thanks to all of my beloved friends and family who spur me on with good recipes and positive quips. All are very appreciated.

Peace and love,

Len

http://trappedinafatman.blogspot.com

30 lbs of fat are gone

Starting Weight: 324.5 lbs
Weight Last Sunday: 297.5
Weight Today: 294
Weight Lost This Week: 3.5 lbs
Weight Lost to Date: 30.5 lbs
Weeks Completed: 8
Weeks to go: 44

What is up people? I'm not going to lie to you, this has been a crappy week. There's been the usual BS at work mixed with my mom in and out of the hospital coupled with Barack Obama announcing that he would like to destroy the industry that puts food on the table for my kids. I voted for him!! Woo woo! Ain't democracy grand.

I am happy the weight continues to come off. I must say it's not that hard to diet. I really enjoy walking and have increased it to 3 miles a day. I had hoped to lose 100 lbs on this experiment and, while that is still the goal, I'm hoping I can maybe get down to 200 lbs (124.5 lbs lost). We'll see.

Since I am in one foul mood I'm not sure what kind of humorous anecdote I can come up with this week. I think "This Week's Nasty Food Side Effect" will be that bane of my existence known as side meat. Side meat is the honey ham sized lumps bolted onto each side of my waste..slightly higher and to the back.

Side meat gets caught on chair handles, door jams, car spoilers, and more. Not all men have side meat. Some men gain all of their weight in the front of their stomachs. My side meat means that some clothes that were made for big people don't fit me. For example, when I finally find a t-shirt that fits around the side meat, it goes down to my knees and the shoulders end about half way down my arms. It's really cool when a t-shirt has a graphic on it...say like Bob Marley. His head actually hangs about even with my groin. Then the side meat kicks in. With the added stretch occurring where his face lands, it actually makes old Bob look like he's grinning. So I walk around with a Rastafarian joker lookin' guy hanging around my waste. If a Big Mac container had a picture of me in my Bob Marley shirt on it, there wouldn't be any fat people.

That's it for this week. I'm changing my blogging schedule yet again. I will have one scheduled blog on Sundays (weigh in day) and may blog mid-week if something cool happens.

Peace and humptiness to all.

Len

http://trappedinafatman.blogspot.com/